I heart my bug vacuum

bugvacuum I heart my bug vacuumConfession time. I’m scared of spiders. And not just regular “eek, a spider!” scared. Scared like I have nightmares about them. When Tyna and I were roommates, she once caught me standing in the corner of our bedroom in the middle of the night trying to knock down a web that I saw while I was asleep. My husband has also been waken by me bent over the bed and coming toward his head with a wad of tissue, trying to smoosh a spider I saw behind him. He asked me what I was doing and when I told him, he said “what was it, luminous? Go back to sleep!” I stood there for a full minute before I realized I really hadn’t seen a spider…

But in real life, I would never “get” a spider with a tissue. That would involve getting way too close. I recall a time I called a friend who lived across town from me in hopes he would come get a spider for me. He wasn’t home, I asked his roommate who I barely knew. I’ll never forget the tone of his voice “will I come get a spider for you? Uh…no.” But he did stay on the phone with me while he talked me through squishing it with a broom.

I realize I sound nuts, I really do. But the fear takes hold of me and there’s nothing I can do. And I’ve heard it all before “they’re more scared of you then you are of them.” I don’t know, I’m pretty scared. And another classic “But spiders eat bugs!” But I’m not afraid of bugs! Logic just goes out the window when a spider is involved. Ever try to tell someone who’s afraid to fly that they’re more likely to get bit by a shark than be in a plane crash? How’d that work out?

Now in my defense, I haven’t had a spider dream in a few years. And there is only one reason for that, my bug vacuum! I heart my bug vacuum I had seen “official” bug vacuums in the Sky Mall in-flight catalogs for years. Problem was they cost about $60 and as much as I thought it was a genius idea, it was never a purchase I wanted to make. Until I was looking for a gift for a friend’s son and came across bug vacuums again. But rather than marketing them towards arachnophobics, they were toys. Complete with “capture” cores, build in magnifiers for viewing and features to safely release the bugs. All that for under $20 bucks, SOLD!

How has this changed my life? Besides ending my nightmares, bug captures now only involve one person-me. The extra long channel allows me to stay a good distance from the spider. And a flip of the magnifier glass keeps it inside the chamber. At which point a little boy would look at it for awhile, say “coooool” then safely release it outside. My release involves a bit of screaming and a toilet flush, but believe me-this is real progress. If you are at all like me, I’m very sorry. But I also highly recommend this product!

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Written by Stef Andrews

18 Comments

  1. Profile photo of Krista
    Krista

    I hate bugs and spiders so much that I trained my dog, Bindhi, to “kill” them. I’ll just yell, “Bindhi, kill!” and she’ll come running, guns a blazing, ready to pounce. She’ll suck the creature right off the wall and tear it apart. If it’s up high, we lift her to it and it’s the same deal. I will say that I miss our other dog, Molly, who passed away in August. She was like Renfield—she LOVED killing spiders, etc., and she’d suck the bug off the wall and eat it in one gulp, so I didn’t have to clean up any legs or guts like I do with the min pin. In either case, I’ve rarely had to handle my own bug killing in almost 9 years. It’s been awesome. A quick tip if you don’t have a dog to do your exterminating for you or if the bug is up high: use your Swiffer mop. In my old house, we always had spiders and a few times we had egg sacks hatch and the only way I was able to kill the hundreds of spiderlings on the ceiling was with my Swiffer mop. I heart that thing.

  2. Profile photo of christy
    christy

    Krista, Bindhi rules! :)

    I can not only attest to Stef’s fear, but I can join in on the bug vacuum train! One of the best Christmas gifts I ever got! After witnessing the most fear inducing spiders of my life while living in the desert….the evil wind scorpions, I called Stef in fear and she sang the praises of the bug vacuum, and that Christmas she got me one!! I was so excited. I can’t explain why the Wind Scorpions induce such fear, I’ve heard they bite but can’t kill you, but when you see one in person, something about their flesh colored extra long legs makes them look like they’ll suck the living essence out of your brain.

    I was so excited about my bug vacuum because the one time I tried to deactivate a wind scorpions life, it took half a bottle of RAID! But now, it’s the bug vacuum to the rescue. I’ve slept better ever since I got it. Thank you Stef.

    And it really is cool, my nephews have one too and love it for getting a close look at various bugs. And you can set them free….unless like me you think they’ll suck your living essence out of your brain at night.. in which case it’s flushville!

  3. Profile photo of Stef Andrews
    Stef Andrews

    Boys sure do love bugs. I am so not a boy.

    I have to add too, I feel terrible killing spiders. I really do. I apologize when I flush the toilet. But I make myself feel better by the fact that I once heard that drowning is not such a bad way to go.

    Christy is so right, if you want to see the most terrifying looking bug/spider in your whole life-google wind scorpion or sun spider. But be warned, they are horrifying!

  4. Profile photo of suzan
    suzan

    Stef, last year you sent us a pic of a giant tarantula sitting in your garage. I don’t think the bug vac is going to suck him up!
    Also to cheer you up about flushing them in a strange way you are still being a do-gooder because you are not spraying 1/2 can of Raid and polluting! Stef or Kristy just wondering how is this bug vac not the same as a Dust Buster?
    For everyone who has bugs that won’t fit into a bug vac or for whatever reasons feels they are to dignified to own one, try out Bioganic Safety Brands Crawling Insect Killer. We have been using this for years, it’s safe around kids and pets. It also doesn’t smell like bug spray or bug spray trying to smell like a field, it smells like Listerine.

  5. Profile photo of winnie
    winnie

    That thing looks awesome! I hate spiders and all bugs! I used to be scared to kill them (and still won’t if they are too big, if i’m going to hear and feel it stomping on it, i won’t) but since i lived in NYC and grew a deep disgust for all things bugs, i have no problem stomping the shit out of them! I feel like one down a gizillion to go! I always hear that, don’t do it, its bad luck, or they eat bugs, but i always say there are plenty more where that one came from and honestly i never noticed my luck changing good or bad after killing a spider. Regarding the bug vacuum i think i’m going to get it for me and my neice. Looks fun!

  6. Profile photo of christy
    christy

    I need to get the Bioganic Safety Insect Killer. I also heard that Borax gets rid of Cockroaches! Here’s the e-how http://www.ehow.com/how_2210174_control-cockroaches-borax.html

    Oh, Susan the Bug vacuum is different than the dust buster because it has a little room to store the bug in, instead of a filter like a dust buster.
    And the opening is wider than a dust buster, so they don’t get smushed. And if you dust bust it you may have bug guts in your filter :)
    where the bug vaccum just takes one bug at a time and lets you have the option to set it free if you like, or flushville like me and Stef! It’s good for one bug, but if you find a colony, it’s Hoover time!

    Oh I also found this.. for green bug exorcisms.
    http://shop.ecosmart.com/

  7. Profile photo of reginamg20
    reginamg20

    hahaha stef you crack me up. if you girls wanna see some sick spiders, look up camel spiders. my boyfriend is a marine and he tells me these horrifying stories about them from back when he was in Iraq. He says that they would have to shoot them for them to die. These little monsters are like 3 feet long. imagine waking up to one of those by your face. aahh!

  8. Profile photo of Tyna Werner
    Tyna Werner

    Thank god for the bug vacuum – I don’t know how Stef lived in the desert without it! The desert sure is beautiful but the spiders they produce are monsters! Regina – eww! They are like something from an alien invasion! (Don’t look Stef)

    http://www.camelspiders.net/

    It’s true; there’s been more than one occasion where I woke up to Stef stumbling around in the dark spastically waving her arms at “spider webs”! It’s awesome –heh. After so many years as roomies and being the official spider getter, you would think it wouldn’t be a problem. Nope, Stef’s paranoia rubbed off on me. I don’t scream and run but they definitely give me a bigger case of the creepie crawlies than they used to.

    I’m suggesting another all natural spider or any bug zapper – a one year old, hyperactive black kitty. Since Giles has been in my place, I’ve noticed a drastic drop in any type of bug in my house. Except for when he leaves the headless, legless corpse of some poor bug on the floor at my bed – cats have bad taste in gifts.

  9. Profile photo of Stef Andrews
    Stef Andrews

    I’ve seen Camel spiders before. Actually I think they’re the same disgusting family as sun spiders and wind scorpions. The worst thing about all of them? They’re hella fast! Like you see it and a split second later it’s under the sofa.

    One time when we first moved to the desert, we opened the front door one night and 3 of them ran in at once. I nearly fainted. And they’re BIG. Like 3 inches long.

    OMG, why am I talking about this?! This post was a terrible idea. Now I itch.

  10. Profile photo of Wednesday
    Wednesday

    OK I’m a freak! I’d get the bug vacuum just to get the spiders, but I’d put them in an aquarium and feed them crickets! I can’t help it!! I love them!! I had a pet tarantula for years. Although I must admit those wind scorpion things make even a spider lover kinda cringe!!!

  11. Profile photo of alli
    alli

    Hi I randomly found this post when Googling around for a bug vac.

    I am a bug spazz and the idea of a bug vac makes me filled with glee.

    My question is, it seems like the reviews for most of the bug vacs say they don’t have enough suction power to really pull the bugs in well.

    I need it mainly because my apartment building has a problem with yellow jackets, and they scare the crap out of me! Do you think this bug vac would be able to suck up a yellow jacket?

    Thanks for your time.

    -Alli

  12. Profile photo of Stef Andrews
    Stef Andrews

    Well Alli, we’ve used this on flying bugs and it worked fine. The problem for us came when we tried to flush them. They just flew out of the toilet! If you’re planning to catch and release outside, you’d be ok.

    But I’ve had another bug vac that wasn’t nearly as strong as these toy ones made by Summit. The one I have has a high/medium/low switch. The high sucks like a Rock of Love contestant! I’m sorry, that’s dirty…

  13. James

    I was slowly reading. And this sentence just seemed to get dirtier as it progressed. I spaced the lines to match my cadence as i read it.

    “My husband has also been waken by me

    bent over the bed

    and coming

    toward his head

    with a wad of tissue”

  14. Scorpi @ black widow spiders

    My partner is afraid of spiders (not paralysingly so, just shudders)and I’m afraid I play on that by running my fingers over his back sometimes and saying ‘spider, spider’ … cruel, I know (cackle, cackle) but he IS from Sudan where spider bites are pretty nasty and I’m from the UK where they don’t bite at all (that I know of!) so I guess our experiences of them are different
    .-= Scorpi @ black widow spiders´s last blog ..Scorpion Control, Scottsdale =-.

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