Web Love – Passive Aggressive Notes

passive2 Web Love   Passive Aggressive Notes

I’ll admit, I am guilty of some passive aggressive note writing in my time. And like all of those on the hilarious gem of a site Passive Aggressive Notes, they stem from when I had to share my space with someone, either a roommate or a co worker. These days if I need something done, I just yell directly (sorry Hub!) No need to pussyfoot around issues anymore.

My notes, like many on the site, always had to do with cleaning, or more properly put, the lack of. Dishes were a constant theme. I once had a roommate who never did them. Or only did them when she needed them, then left them overflowing in the sink until the next time. I can’t tell you how many times I left her notes about how “we” needed to try to clean up better after ourselves. Reasons ranged from cockroaches to company. It all came to an abrupt end when I carried a sink full of dirty, greasy dishes into her room and left them on her bed with the shining star in my passive aggressive note hall of fame “Here, I’m sick of looking at these. Why don’t you look at them for awhile!” (oh, how I wish I would have kept that.)

Passive Aggressive Notes compiles “painfully polite and hilariously hostile writings from shared spaces around the world.” I can spend hours marveling over the site. As mentioned, cleanliness is a very popular theme, with the microwave (damn you Deborah!) and random hairs being a real sore spot to a lot of passive aggressive note writers. Stealing is another hot topic, with the theft of the Hot Pocket apparently on the rise (they are quite delicious).

One thing to keep in mind if you need to write a note of your own. Use ALL CAPS. It helps the person to know that you really mean it. Also, whenever possible, underline key points, preferably with a different color. And for a true passive aggressive masterpiece, add hearts.

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Written by stef


  1. Profile photo of krista

    Back in college, I had a friend (less of a friend, more of a creepy SWF-type) who sublet her apartment one summer, not realizing she’d need a place to stay because of a summer class. She begged to stay in Mike’s and my guest room for that summer. I am a nice person. I relented. What followed could only be described as four months of sheer HELL. It was almost 100 degrees that whole summer and our AC barely cooled the place to 85 and she’d complain that she was cold and turn on the HEAT. She also never washed a dish. Since all of the dishes in the place were mine, I removed all but 3 of everything. I gave each of us one plate, bowl, glass, and silverware set and said if I saw anything sitting in the sink, I was keeping it. Did that help? No, she brought in more plates from home and proceeded to not wash them. I finally left a passive aggressive note from “Your friendly neighborhood roaches” that thanked her for the dirty dishes and that they loved them so much, they were taking them. Yep. I took her dishes she brought and hid them from her. She brought back even more dishes from home. I took them and gave her a pack of paper plates and plastic utensils. She left them on the counter after she used them instead of throwing them away. Needless to say, our friendship ended after that summer :P

  2. Profile photo of christy

    Hilarious site Stef… I love the hostile hot pockets note! Who could tolerate a hot pocket thief~
    and Krista YIKES!
    glad she’s out of your life & I’m sure the friendly roaches followed her to keep her company haha :)

  3. Profile photo of irene

    I’ve had my share of nice notes, especially at the office.. Those weekend receptionist tore thru all of our stuff. My dear husband never had to use notes. Rather, when a roommate would constantly eat what was NOT his.. He simply made a very appealing ex-lax pudding pie.. You got it that solved it within 24 hours

  4. Profile photo of Stef Andrews
    Stef Andrews

    An ex of mine had someone in his office who used to take bites of everyone’s sandwiches. Just a couple of bites, then put the sandwich back. Can you imagine? So my ex gathered all the hair from the shower drain for about a week, made a tuna hoagie and hid the hair in the tuna at the edges of the sandwich! The sandwiches stopped having bites missing from them from there out…

  5. Profile photo of Michele ME Bridgeman
    Michele ME Bridgeman

    My ex-hubby’s step-mother left notes by all of the light switches in the house (by the doors and in the bathroom) with “Before you leave, did you…” and “shut off the light” “flush the toilet” “pick up your towels” “close the garage door” and other nasty little reminders like that. I guess since the boys (3) were all teenagers she could get away with an all-encompassing notes like that. I often joked that I would switch the signs around between the doors since some of them were different.

    I’d be subtle like a freight train if I had a roommate from hell as mentioned above from Krista. I’d be leaving the dirty dishes in a wash basin on her bed, under her covers, etc…making sure I had a pretty darned good lock on my own bedroom door, of course.

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